Sunday, October 05, 2008

What's On My Mind

  • I am battling a case of the blahs. In technical terms, that's a touch of dysthymia. I know it and--I just can't get myself to care much.
  • Last night I dreamt I woke up in bedroom that I hadn't been in for some time. A large room, I had evidentally lived there or spent much time there in the past. And then I left, moved out, and thought it was now empty. But much to my surprise, when I started looking behind the furniture, I saw all sorts of stuff that hadn't been thrown out: golf clubs, for one, and other sorts of guy stuff. Was this D's stuff? Yes, I think so. Except that when I was talking about him, I kept referring to him as H (my first husband), something I never did in life. When I woke up, I thought--whoa! it doesn't take a Jungian scholar to figure that one out.
  • I'm worried about the economy, my economy that is, which unfortunately is badly impacted, or so I feel, by the nation's economy. Maybe it's not and maybe I'm just reacting to the incessantly dire headlines.
  • And this election has me twitching. I hate the way people are so nasty about it. I hate the way it makes me so angry and wanting to be nasty to people.
  • I came back from the conference in Vegas with all sorts of good ideas for "growing" MidLifeBloggers. I can't remember any of them now.
  • I can't focus on one thing to do, so I do nothing. Not nothing, because I'm not capable of just sitting. But I fritter...I knit a bit and I blog a bit and I cook a bit and I craft a bit. But all those bits don't add up to a feeling of accomplishment such that it will push me out of the blahs.
  • I'm off right now to cook...and then garden...and then--I don't know.

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